feedmysoul

Sunday, December 03, 2006

WARNING- WHINGER AHEAD

Sat night had to miss the Bloggers dinner due to a hens night that began at 4pm and was meant to continue till 4am. Having the tri the next morning I opted out earlier than that. One of the events was pole dancing which I have to say was a lot of fun but ended up pulling a muscle in my upper leg.  It was a bit embarrassing at first being the only oldie doing I tas the rest piked out at the last minute, but once I accepted that I had a lot of laughs.
OK Triathalon No 2 yesterday and now I am firmly convinced that I am an idiot for attempting these.  With only 3 hours sleep I awoke to rain. That’s it I thought and went back to bed. Got up 15minutes later and dressed quickly and was in the car by 5am for the drive to the event. Got there and my chain had come off the bike. For the first time I put it back on. Then noticed the tyre had gone down a little. Had bought a hand pump in case but it didn’t seem to make any difference. I went to a petrol station and their air machine was broken!! Went to registration and registered, set up my bike and met the girls that had befriended me last time. We went down to the water. First problem it was a 1km track downhill, which of course meant it would be uphill after the swim!! 2nd Problem, there were 1.5metre waves. SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 3rd problem it had been advertised as 250metre swim but they announced it was 300m.
This time the men were going first so we waited, shivering in the freezing wind until it was our turn. I really did not want to go in the water. The siren went and in we went. Well all I can say is I think I swallowed half the ocean. I did swim more than last time but the waves just kept pushing me in the wrong direction. 2 girls were pulled into boats and the lifesaver asked me a few times was I ok as I lagged behind the others. I swore a lot and mumbled that I did not want to quit. He was lovely and actually paddled beside me till the very end. I cannot stand water in my face and definitely not up my nose and the buoys just kept getting  further away after each time I was dumped. He let me touch the 2nd buoy rather than swim around it because even holding onto it I could not get around it as the waves kept pushing me away. Had trouble getting to shore as I was sooo exhausted. Think with only 10 meters to go it took about 4 mins to get to firm ground. No one else in sight of course. Then the 1km track uphill, in bare feet to the bikes. Got there and as you entered from the other end could not find my bike. Someone had kindly knocked it to the ground and left it there. Took off my wet suit and pulled on a singlet and ran to the exit. Of course my helmet was on backwards so was told to change it.
Got on the bike in the mount area and the girl I beat last time was just ahead of me. Tried to catch her but with head win, flattish tyre and exhaustion could not so she stayed the same distance in front of me all the way. Talking to her later I found out she has been doing these for two years and she told me the tyres do hold you up if not pumped up enough. At the half way mark I spotted another girl so peddled as hard as I could to overtake her and then just kept trying as hard as I could so she couldn’t catch me. When it came to dismount I had trouble getting off the bike. I am convinced my legs and become welded into peddling position.  Also I was dying to go to the toilet. Must have been all that ocean water wanting to get out. Into transition and tried to run out to catch the girl in front of me, almost did, only to be reminded I still had my helmet on so had to run back to put it back. Then tried to run and the pulled muscle in my leg reminded me that running was bad for you. I walked most of it as quickly as I could and ran short spurts. Couldn’t see the girl I had passed so convinced myself she had quit.  Other people kept coming the other way and cutting me off. How rude, couldn’t they see I was competing?? The volunteers were wonderful and encouraging but I felt quite humiliated to be unable to run and being so far behind. Thought they must be thinking “what a loser, she isn’t even trying.” About 100metres before entering the oval I heard someone running and turned to see the girl I had passed running with a friend trying to catch me. Now the panic set in. I ran as hard as I could and the finish line in site my lovely ladies were cheering me on. Somehow I staggered through the finish line ready to collapse. It looked good they said because the 2 girls were running behind me trying to catch me.
The girls had to race off so I collected my bike and went and sat in the line for a leg massage as I was having trouble walking. Also discovered a massive rash that now looks like a burn. I had worn very short shorts for the whole event so I wouldn’t have to change out of bathers. Decided it didn’t matter how bad I looked in short shorts if it helped me be faster in transition. The worst fat rash ever where the wet bathers and my fat legs rubbed together. I can hardly walk today as a result. Geez I haven’t had a fat rash for years!
The masseuse was a tri athlete and told me to enter a tri club and also advised that I should not have gone on the 3 ½ hour bike ride I did last Tuesday with my trainer. Here I thought I was doing good training hard and he said it would have made my legs fatigued
So I came second last and had to run to do it, all my times were way worse than last time but it was a harder course and had the 1km track from swim to transition. I should feel proud that I did it but I don’t. I feel flat and disappointed. I wanted to do better, and I didn’t. I made silly mistakes like with the helmets and an injured leg is just stupid. I should have not done the lifts in the pole dancing. I think I am feeling a bit of a fool because I take on these things that I do not have the ability to do. It is humiliating being so bad. This was the culmination of a shitty few weeks and instead of inspiring me like it was supposed to it just matched the rest of the things in my life lately. I know tomorrow is another day and I need to get a better attitude and fake it till I make it but I am sick of faking it. Think it would be easier to be a big fat blob with low expectations. This week is nothing to look forward to and the thought of Christmas in 3 weeks is nauseating. My house is a mess, work sucks, I haven’t done Christmas shopping or planning, I am eating like a pig and today I can’t even exercise because my leg, and back  hurt so much. And I am a big, getting fatter whinger who knows there are way worse problems in life than my own. But still mine are here in my head 24 hours a day.
I HATE THE OCEAN_ ONLY FISH SHOULD TRY TO SWIM IN IT!!!
Posted by michelle :: 3:03 pm :: 9 comments

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